I think I've figured out why I don't really have any close close friends. I am secretly intimidated and scared by people's problems. My life is pretty even-keel, not much drama, not too many issues. So when my friends maybe want to talk about their deeper feelings, I draw back because I'm not really sure how to handle it. Do I offer advice? Just listen? Hug them? I end up feeling awkward. I really want to be someone's best friend who they share things with and with whom I can talk about deep feelings. But I end up just being the friend that is just there to hang out and have fun with. It happened in high school, and it's happening again in college. It always feels like a one-way street--I share, and the other person listens, and then goes on their merry way. Maybe I just don't realize that they're sharing their heart when they talk to me, but it sure doesn't usually feel that way.
Maybe I should not feel sorry for myself.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Friday, May 23, 2008
Verse-that-can-be-taken-ridiculously-out-of-context Friday
"Mom, why did Aunt Susie try to dry her hair in the toaster oven?"
"Because God deprived her of wisdom, and did not endow her with her share of understanding."
(Job 39:17)
"Because God deprived her of wisdom, and did not endow her with her share of understanding."
(Job 39:17)
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Long time....
Blogger has been stupid and I have been lazy. That is why I have not posted anything in a while. But now things have happened, so I must inform all those who hang on my every word what is going on in my life. =)
This summer, for a month, I am helping an author write a novel. He sends me a chapter, written very badly like a movie script, and I write it like a novel. I have a lot of questions for him but overall sounds like a really cool experience.
I am also trying to get hired at Coldstone, although I almost hope that I don't get hired because then I could work at Marble Slab (which is exactly like Coldstone, just better) and not have to take out my nose ring or sing and dance. But we'll see what God has for me.
I have a new blog "series" coming soon....Watch for "Verses-to-take-ridiculously-out-of-context Fridays." Hopefully, I won't forget this Friday....
This summer, for a month, I am helping an author write a novel. He sends me a chapter, written very badly like a movie script, and I write it like a novel. I have a lot of questions for him but overall sounds like a really cool experience.
I am also trying to get hired at Coldstone, although I almost hope that I don't get hired because then I could work at Marble Slab (which is exactly like Coldstone, just better) and not have to take out my nose ring or sing and dance. But we'll see what God has for me.
I have a new blog "series" coming soon....Watch for "Verses-to-take-ridiculously-out-of-context Fridays." Hopefully, I won't forget this Friday....
Friday, May 9, 2008
I've succumbed
1) What's the full name on your birth certificate?Abigail JaneAnne Foyle
2) When was the last time you were told you were beautiful? I wish it was recently (yes, this could be read as a plea for a concilatory "Abby, you are beautiful") =)
4) Is your phone within a meter radius of you? No
5) Look at your recent calls, who was your last call from? See above question? Not getting it to see
6) What is bothering you right now? My lack of self-control in certain areas of my life
7) Was New Years enjoyable? Not really. Some of it was. I cried for a lot of it.
8) Who was the last person to play with your hair? My mom? Maybe?
9) Do you miss someone right now? Hmmm...Jenny, Sara, Emma, Lora, Laura, Grecia.....the list goes on and on
10) What does your last received text message say? See question 5
12) What is your favorite color?Blue or purple or green
13) Is there a high chance of you going out to the movies soon? No, I have no money. I almost went the other night, but I didn't have money.
14) When was the last time you got a back massage? 5 days, 13 hours, and 24 seconds ago
15) Are you easily scared by horror/thriller films? Depends on how realistic they are. Saw? Didn't get too too scared... No Country For Old Men? Nearly had a panic attack on the way back up to my room
16) If you were given $100, would you spend it, or save it? Saving sounds so good, but clothes look better. =)
17) If there was a large spider in the room, would you stay? Yes, especially since it would be dead because I would smash it with my shoe.
18) What are you doing this weekend? Cleaning my stuff out of the garage and running a 5k.
19) Last place you went out to eat? Chili's!
20) Where are you right now? My living room in front of the the (surprise!) computer
21) Are you listening to music right now? Nope!
22) Do you have any enemies? Sometimes I like to think I do because maybe it would mean someone would be jealous of me but then I realize that that is ridiculous and I would really hate it if anyone hated me
23) What does your tenth text message say? O don't have that many messages overall =)
25) Hows the weather today?It was a very nice breezy day!
26) When was the last time you were truly, completely happy with your life? I don't know. Maybe recently...
27) What are you thinking about right now? this survey...i usually don't think about more than one thing at once. =)
28)When was the last time you intentionally made someone cry? I'm not sure I ever have. I have deliberately made people mad, but I never mean to push them to the point of tears
30) What are you doing tomorrow? Running a 5k and cleaning out the garage
31) What are you doing tonight? Going to bed and sleeping!
32) Could you date someone taller then you? Yes please. In fact, I like my men over 6 feet tall. =)
33) Next time you will kiss someone? How am I supposed to predict this???
34) Where was your default picture taken? on the green outside my dorm
35) What's your favorite number? 21
36) What is your current mood? Guilty that I'm not in bed yet...I'm getting up at 6:30 am tomorrow
38) What sport do you enjoy watching? usc football, duck's hockey, fpu basketball
39) Ever had a near death experience? I almost drowned when I was 2. My dad saved my life. =)
40) What was the highlight of your week? Losing my love handles...=)
41) Are you happy right now? Overall, yes.
42) Whats the last thing someone said to you? "What are you laughing at?" (At the moment, I was reading Katie Friesen's blog=))
43) Where is your phone? In my room
44) Who/what do you hate/dislike currently? I dislike....job hunting.
45) Have you ever been given an engagement ring? Um, nope. My friends are cheap.
46) When is your Birthday? November 8th. It's okay. You can still send that present now. I won't return it. =)
47) How do you feel about your hair right now? Hm, it's pretty good. I want to dye it again.
48) What do you miss most about the past? Being carefree
49) Are you afraid of falling in love? Only if the person didn't love me back. But I love the idea of it anyway.
50) Do you have anyone who you consider a brother/sister but they really aren't? I would do anything for my close friends. I guess that really didn't answer the question, but it explains the way I feel about them. So, whatever.
51) How many people did you hug today? I jumped on top of my mom. Does that count?
52) Do you like country music? Yes, certain songs I enjoy. Don't ask me to name them because I don't really know.
53) Did any of your friends go out with any of your ex's? I don't own a letter of the alphabet. And if I did, I would certainly not let any of my friends do anything with it.
54) Are looks important? Yes, I would truly like to not be repulsed at the sight of others
55) Have you ever had someone sing to you? I declare this a ridiculous question. Anyone who has had a birthday has had someone sing to them. And everyone has had a birthday. So, logically, everyone has had someone sing to them.
56) Are you mad at someone right now? No. Maybe a certain boy for being flirty. And not flirty with me. =)
57) Where do you keep your money? In the bank? Isn't that where most people keep it?
58) Do you have any tattoos or piercings? I have three piercings--two in my ears and one in my nose
59) Do you believe in love? All you need is love. Heck yes I do.
60) How old do you want to be when you have kids? That really depends on when I get married. When I was young and played dress-up, I would be married at 18 and having children by 19 or 20. I'm sort of behind that timeline. I only have about 6 more months to find a man. Augh. And here I am wasting time on blogger.
61) What would you do if someone smacked your butt? I would smack theirs back. Unless it was someone I didn't know. Or a man.
62) Is there something that has happened in your past that you really hate talking about? I feel like I'm pretty open about most things. It would depend, however, on the person I was talking about the "something" with.
I used the word "depend" a lot in this survey.
2) When was the last time you were told you were beautiful? I wish it was recently (yes, this could be read as a plea for a concilatory "Abby, you are beautiful") =)
4) Is your phone within a meter radius of you? No
5) Look at your recent calls, who was your last call from? See above question? Not getting it to see
6) What is bothering you right now? My lack of self-control in certain areas of my life
7) Was New Years enjoyable? Not really. Some of it was. I cried for a lot of it.
8) Who was the last person to play with your hair? My mom? Maybe?
9) Do you miss someone right now? Hmmm...Jenny, Sara, Emma, Lora, Laura, Grecia.....the list goes on and on
10) What does your last received text message say? See question 5
12) What is your favorite color?Blue or purple or green
13) Is there a high chance of you going out to the movies soon? No, I have no money. I almost went the other night, but I didn't have money.
14) When was the last time you got a back massage? 5 days, 13 hours, and 24 seconds ago
15) Are you easily scared by horror/thriller films? Depends on how realistic they are. Saw? Didn't get too too scared... No Country For Old Men? Nearly had a panic attack on the way back up to my room
16) If you were given $100, would you spend it, or save it? Saving sounds so good, but clothes look better. =)
17) If there was a large spider in the room, would you stay? Yes, especially since it would be dead because I would smash it with my shoe.
18) What are you doing this weekend? Cleaning my stuff out of the garage and running a 5k.
19) Last place you went out to eat? Chili's!
20) Where are you right now? My living room in front of the the (surprise!) computer
21) Are you listening to music right now? Nope!
22) Do you have any enemies? Sometimes I like to think I do because maybe it would mean someone would be jealous of me but then I realize that that is ridiculous and I would really hate it if anyone hated me
23) What does your tenth text message say? O don't have that many messages overall =)
25) Hows the weather today?It was a very nice breezy day!
26) When was the last time you were truly, completely happy with your life? I don't know. Maybe recently...
27) What are you thinking about right now? this survey...i usually don't think about more than one thing at once. =)
28)When was the last time you intentionally made someone cry? I'm not sure I ever have. I have deliberately made people mad, but I never mean to push them to the point of tears
30) What are you doing tomorrow? Running a 5k and cleaning out the garage
31) What are you doing tonight? Going to bed and sleeping!
32) Could you date someone taller then you? Yes please. In fact, I like my men over 6 feet tall. =)
33) Next time you will kiss someone? How am I supposed to predict this???
34) Where was your default picture taken? on the green outside my dorm
35) What's your favorite number? 21
36) What is your current mood? Guilty that I'm not in bed yet...I'm getting up at 6:30 am tomorrow
38) What sport do you enjoy watching? usc football, duck's hockey, fpu basketball
39) Ever had a near death experience? I almost drowned when I was 2. My dad saved my life. =)
40) What was the highlight of your week? Losing my love handles...=)
41) Are you happy right now? Overall, yes.
42) Whats the last thing someone said to you? "What are you laughing at?" (At the moment, I was reading Katie Friesen's blog=))
43) Where is your phone? In my room
44) Who/what do you hate/dislike currently? I dislike....job hunting.
45) Have you ever been given an engagement ring? Um, nope. My friends are cheap.
46) When is your Birthday? November 8th. It's okay. You can still send that present now. I won't return it. =)
47) How do you feel about your hair right now? Hm, it's pretty good. I want to dye it again.
48) What do you miss most about the past? Being carefree
49) Are you afraid of falling in love? Only if the person didn't love me back. But I love the idea of it anyway.
50) Do you have anyone who you consider a brother/sister but they really aren't? I would do anything for my close friends. I guess that really didn't answer the question, but it explains the way I feel about them. So, whatever.
51) How many people did you hug today? I jumped on top of my mom. Does that count?
52) Do you like country music? Yes, certain songs I enjoy. Don't ask me to name them because I don't really know.
53) Did any of your friends go out with any of your ex's? I don't own a letter of the alphabet. And if I did, I would certainly not let any of my friends do anything with it.
54) Are looks important? Yes, I would truly like to not be repulsed at the sight of others
55) Have you ever had someone sing to you? I declare this a ridiculous question. Anyone who has had a birthday has had someone sing to them. And everyone has had a birthday. So, logically, everyone has had someone sing to them.
56) Are you mad at someone right now? No. Maybe a certain boy for being flirty. And not flirty with me. =)
57) Where do you keep your money? In the bank? Isn't that where most people keep it?
58) Do you have any tattoos or piercings? I have three piercings--two in my ears and one in my nose
59) Do you believe in love? All you need is love. Heck yes I do.
60) How old do you want to be when you have kids? That really depends on when I get married. When I was young and played dress-up, I would be married at 18 and having children by 19 or 20. I'm sort of behind that timeline. I only have about 6 more months to find a man. Augh. And here I am wasting time on blogger.
61) What would you do if someone smacked your butt? I would smack theirs back. Unless it was someone I didn't know. Or a man.
62) Is there something that has happened in your past that you really hate talking about? I feel like I'm pretty open about most things. It would depend, however, on the person I was talking about the "something" with.
I used the word "depend" a lot in this survey.
Summer!
Things I want to get accomplished this summer:
1. Get a job
2. Make a quilt for my bed for next year
3. Complete the Advanced Math book
4. Learn to cook without burning or ruining something
5. Get a tan
6. Learn graciousness and patience
1. Get a job
2. Make a quilt for my bed for next year
3. Complete the Advanced Math book
4. Learn to cook without burning or ruining something
5. Get a tan
6. Learn graciousness and patience
Monday, May 5, 2008
Life--ever confusing, rarely fulfilling
I feel like I should be doing something grand and wonderful with my life. I feel like I should be adventurous, living somewhere else for the summer, volunteering to help those who are in need, learning about God and His heart, and maturing as a person. Yet I am at home, looking for a job, reading about someone who helps those in need, and forgetting to read my Bible. I want to be someone I'm not right now but could become at some point in life. I'm just tired of waiting until I'm old enough to become that person. What am I doing in my life that truly glorifies God? What am I doing that matters?
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Of home, pain, and cleaning
Well, I am home for the summer. I'm very glad to be back and settling in with my family. I get to go shopping with my grandma tomorrow, so I'm definitely excited about that. =) I also miss my friends froms school! It's weird, after seeing them pretty much everyday for about 8 months, to suddenly not see them at all. And I'm back in this "world." My home world and my school rarely, if ever, mix, so it's hard to even talk about school things or people because it's hard for my family to relate. Ah well. Summer will still be fun.
Today, I was pulling my very large and very heavy suitcase in from the garage and I ran it over my big toe, which pulled the nail up and made it bleed. It hurts a lot and looks gross. Ouch.
Speaking of pain, my kitty has had a bump on his side for a while now. My mom was planning on taking him in yesterday for vaccinations and to get the bump (which was making him act weird and not eat very much) looked at. Well, I got a phone call from Stephanie on Friday as Mom and I were driving through Bakersfield on the way home from school. She said that the bump (which was the size of a small fist) had exploded on the chair and she was taking him to the vet. It turned out he had been in a fight and gotten bit pretty deep and an abcess had formed. So he had surgery yesterday and now he has a cone and stitches and a tube to flush the wound and a tube that oozes pus constantly. Yeah. It's as gross as it sounds. And he wanted to sleep on my bed today. I put him on a towel.
I have no idea where I'm going to put all my stuff. Ergh. And I have a lot of clothes...and a lot of other random stuff...hopefully it can mostly stay in the garage. The End.
Today, I was pulling my very large and very heavy suitcase in from the garage and I ran it over my big toe, which pulled the nail up and made it bleed. It hurts a lot and looks gross. Ouch.
Speaking of pain, my kitty has had a bump on his side for a while now. My mom was planning on taking him in yesterday for vaccinations and to get the bump (which was making him act weird and not eat very much) looked at. Well, I got a phone call from Stephanie on Friday as Mom and I were driving through Bakersfield on the way home from school. She said that the bump (which was the size of a small fist) had exploded on the chair and she was taking him to the vet. It turned out he had been in a fight and gotten bit pretty deep and an abcess had formed. So he had surgery yesterday and now he has a cone and stitches and a tube to flush the wound and a tube that oozes pus constantly. Yeah. It's as gross as it sounds. And he wanted to sleep on my bed today. I put him on a towel.
I have no idea where I'm going to put all my stuff. Ergh. And I have a lot of clothes...and a lot of other random stuff...hopefully it can mostly stay in the garage. The End.
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